||[Aug. 9th, 2005|11:34 am]
Superman's Widow Gets CancerDana Reeve, the widow of deceased Superman star Christopher Reeve, has decided to preemptively respond to shocking revelations about her in an upcoming tabloid.
On the one hand, she admits that some of the claims are correct. She is, indeed, struggling with lung cancer. And as the chairwoman of the Christopher and Dana Reeve Paralysis Foundation, she will redirect its advocacy and research towards lung cancer. Accordingly, the organization will be renamed the Christopher and Dana Reeve Lung Cancer Foundation.
On the other hand, she disputes the publication's assertion that she said the following to a friend in a restaurant:
People are going to talk so much shit when they hear about this. They'll say I'm ditching the paralysis cause now that I've got cancer. But it's not like Chris ever gave a shit about paralysis until the accident. Then all of a sudden he's a hero 'cause he gets wheeled to award shows and begs for money to cure himself. Yeah, well, fuck that dead cripple! I'm the still here. And I plan to stick around.Disclaimer: The above is a fictional account. The only factual news it contains is that Dana Reeve has lung cancer, which she totally deserves for all those years of smoking kryptonite rocks.